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I wrote a dumb funny thing on the internet. now it's a major tv show. 

At the end of 2019, I wrote an essay for HuffPost called "I'm an Ethical Pimp. Here's What a Typical Day is Like For Me and The Women I Employ." It got some clicks, it got some likes, it got some online hate. Then it faded away, Covid happened, and I forgot about it.

 

In 2021, HuffPost republished it. And that's when I got a call from an American TV producer. "What kind of a phishing-scammy-

catfish-con is this?" I wondered (with my inside voice, of course).

 

And guess what, guys? It was not a scam.

Before I knew it, I was represented by United Talent Agency, and chatting with multiple TV and movie producers about putting my story as a madam on the big (or small!) screen. Some of them were big international names, names you would definitely recognize.

 

But ultimately, I realized...you know what? This is a New Zealand story. It should be made by a New Zealand team.

 

That's how I ultimately paired up with the NZ/USA dream team of Four Knights / Tavake Films, XYZ Films, and Fifth Season.

 

And then we were all instantly rich and famous and we bought big, gaudy villas in the South of France.

 

Kidding!! It's been a painstaking, slow, and sometimes agonizing process, scattered with incredible thrills along the way. For example:

 

I did not anticipate my life would include a two-hour interview with the amazing Rachel Griffiths so she could study my Northern Californian dialect. Did not. See that. Coming.

 

I did not know that a female pubic wig is called a "merkin," nor that a male prosthetic penis is called a "stunt cock."

 

I did not expect that this exceptional team of writers (including showrunners Harry McNaughton and Shosh McCallum) could change almost all the details in my story, and yet still reveal the raw truth underneath.

 

"I'm in your braaaaain," said Harry last year, and you know what? Have at it. Because you guys—and the hundreds of cast and crew you worked with—all made an incredible show.

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